The Trouble with Girls

In my previous post regarding what to get for my daughter's birthday I alluded to the fact that 9 year old girls are difficult to buy TOYS for, and have not changed my thoughts much since speaking to her regarding her upcoming 9th birthday, in July.

Is the toy market the domain for boys? On the surface it might appear so, but when you look at the range of toys available for girls maybe not. 

The key problem is that the boys market for toys remains strong through the all the key age bands, from 0-5, 6-10 and 11-15's. With websites like Firebox, Play &  Boystoys all catering for grown up boys, and selling a large range of toys that younger boys would like too. For example, the Nerf range is popular with 6 year olds and 15 year olds, and 35 year olds alike. I'm not sure the same could be said of any particular girls range.

James May's Toy Stories series on the BBC has also highlighted the fact that boys, even in their latter years fondly remember their old toys and occasionally dig out their cars, trains, Lego, etc,. and play with them, or invest time with thier sons renovating a Dinky Car or building Lego. 

Boys it appears are more likely to continue and remain playing with toys forever. I know i have as much Lego as my son...

As I approach my 40th year, and embark on launching a fully fledged toy store online, it is done with the sense of wanting to be part of 'toys', because I love them so much, and want to be involved with the nostalgia in 20-30years time when programmes look back at the toys of today and my kids can say 'do you remember playing with that', or 'I had one of those', knowing I was selling those toys to kids is just satisfying... 

Women of similar age to me will today be saying that about today's retrospective programmes that look back at the toys they played with, but will the girls of today in 20-30 years be looking back and remembering? I'm not so sure. Its not that girls toys won't have a sense of nostalgia, its more likely that girls won't really remember toys, rather other things about their childhood.

Why is this so? Well my wife and I have spent many an hour discussing our own children and their playing habits. And we've come up with a couple of theories. Mostly nothing to do with the offering of toys on the market.

Firstly if we look at our own childhood, kids played with toys, and adults went out to work. Mum's cooked tea, Dads came home late, Adults were adults and kids were clearly defined as kids. 

You didn't wear anything your Dad or Mum did and didn't own any products your parents owned. You didn't want any association with your parents.

Today its different, adults have playthings, and kids want them too, and kids want to be young adults. 

When we were kids, there were 4 channels on the TV, probably a video player (hired from Rumbelows) underneath, and a couple of blank cassettes with films recorded on them, you didn't buy pre-recorded videos in them days! 

I remember when ET came out at our local video shop they sold it off after its time on rental - it was £80, for an over used VHS copy in a rental box! No one owned pre-recorded videos.

When the Walkman came out my mum and dad didn't own one, they didn't have the time, it was a product for kids & teenagers, to keep them quite on car journeys. Kids recorded music off the radio on tape and listened to it quietly. There was no video console, unless your richer neighbour had managed to get Pong. Kids went to arcades to play games - which at the time were the most advanced we'd ever seen. Arcades have mainly closed down, as today kids veg at home...

Today, kids want and own the same products as their parents. What's the target market for an I-pod? Even if Apple believe its 15+, kids in my daughter's class have I-pods, but so do I and so does my mother, who is approaching 65.

Likewise, with mobile phones, which have become the domain of tweens and beyond, the lines of age have blurred. 

Clothing too is now transcending age bands. Shops like Claire's Accessories are attractive to girls of 6 and over, but also are places that young women go to get an accessory for a party, wedding or night out. Similar things are happening at clothes outlets like Hennes, who sell Hello Kitty ranges from 0-15 and then in the adult range too. Girls want to look like their older reference points, Rhianna, Kylie, Katy Perry, Jessie J etc., and their older sisters, and even their mothers.

If we compare our household to that of my household of the 70's. We had 1 TV, plus my sister and I got bought a B&W set when I was 7, it had a tuning dial - no remote! We had one video machine (rented), and one music player. I owned a record player, and a Walkman, when i was 14. (1985). we didn't own any games consoles, until I got a handheld Pacman game in the mid 80's, it only played Pacman and ran on batteries.

Today in our house we own 5 TV's, one in each of the three bedrooms, a main one in the lounge and a spare in the kitchen. We have two blu-ray players, 2 dvd players with the kids TV's, twin car dvd players (for journeys), 3 genuine i-pods, 2 other mp3 players, 2 x DSi consoles, 1 PSP console, 1 x PS3 console, 1 x Wii console, 4 laptops, 2 netbooks, 4 mobile phones, 200+ DVD's & Blu-ray, and a lot more besides. All of which is paid for by the parents, but is accessible and played with by everyone in the household. Kids use the Internet, have a mobile (for emergencies at the moment), have mp3 players, a netbook, access to the consoles. 

Is it our fault that, as kids, who grew up during a time of technology growth, which has lead to this over indulgence in products that we use and encourage our kids to use too. Have we lead them down a path that ultimately leads them away from playing with real toys too early. 

I think with girls its possibly the case. Boys still play with toys, and Dads still enjoy engaging with their sons and their play, guns and building are still manly things to do, even through play and this is even with the distraction of computer games. It may be that boys stop playing with toys between the ages of 13 -16 but they come back, and buy gadgets and toys like RC cars, Scalextric when they have their own disposable income, boys (men) buy toys forever. 

Which brings me back to the girls, what can we do to get them to engage with playing with toys. Is it the case that mum's and aunties need to encourage play? Or do we need to encourage play in other ways. No self respecting 8 year old girl wants to dress up and play shops, they want to go to the shops and buy make up and dress up nice for real. 

Girls have recently gotten into crazes like boys, but these are not long term play products, quick throwaway collectables that trend really quickly, and do not engage interactive play. Iwako, squinkies etc,. are fun and cheap but ultimately do nothing except pile up in school bags, and get lost.

I do think some of the cleverer brands are getting into the fashion conscious girls, and flying in the face of protests that clothing is sexualising our kids, by making products like Humarika, Monster High and Mattel's Fashionista ranges appeal to young girls who are interested in fashion, and music.

Fashion play doesn't have to be provocative to be enjoyed by girls, but it does have to reflect the world around us, and as such toy makers seem to be tapping into this market. After all what was Girl's World, other than a toy aimed at girls putting makeup on, and getting ready for a night out. And is it no less important to get girls interested in clothes and fashion, and dressing up dolls nicely, as it is to teach them about feeding babies and domestic chores, that baby and cooking ranges like Baby Anabel and Chad Valley aim to do?

Girls get stereotyped at a young age, and as they grow up they rebel against that, which is why toys that your parents don't really like become most wanted for the mid age child groups, toys like Bratz, and Monster High are often opposed to by parents but are loved by tween girls, and we need to realise this as parents. More grown up toys that involve fun things that girls enjoy doing should be encouraged, Harimuka is a prime example, and one that we will be buying for our daughter. There's no stopping the tide of technology and the Internet. We have to compete with this as toy buying parents, and we have to be savvy, many sites now produce ranges that link to the popular websites. 

It is a challenging time for parents of girls, for sure, and its only going to get more so, as technology gets more affordable and accessible and girls rebel against parents from a younger age than ever before. We have to embrace the fact that they want to be different, but also that they want to emulate us. A balance needs to be met, and perhaps we need to sit down and spend more time with our daughters to relate to them and help them enjoy their childhood, perhaps more so than ever before. 

It's certainly something to think about going forward, not only for parents but also for toy makers.